The perils of Pumping

When i had my daughter we tried nursing. Because she is tonge tied it made it difficult to latch on. Once that was determined the reason for her inability to nurse i was given the option to pump. I remember it like it was yesterday (you never forget your first time hehe) my mother and i were sitting in the lactaion office at the hospital. The consultant came in with the pump. Got me all hooked up, and wouldnt you know it i screamed at her soon as she turned it on!! haha I was embarassed and mad all at the same time. I was also young and dumb and swore i wasnt doing that again. When my daughter turned 5months i found out i was pregnant with her brother...4 months later i was put to the test yet once again. Thankfully he wasnt tonge tied. He tried to nurse but my milk hadnt come in untill 4 days after he was born. By that time he was used to the bottle..so i didnt even try.
When i became pregnant with Raiden my husband was adimit about his son nursing. For my love for him i said we can at least try. Little did we know that he was going to be born with HLHS. Once he was stable in the PICU i made myself pump..i kept telling myself that this was for the health of my son, and that he needed my milk more than formula and it was going to help him get strong and healthy. (might be why i over produced too) I felt and still feel like im a milk factory! My supply has gone down within this last week, and im trying every natural way of getting my supply back. Its never fun having maintenance men working on your apartment and screwing with your schedule..but its a thousand times worse when you need to pump or nurse your baby. I could have put a note on the door telling them to come back in 45 min, but i know the work would never had gotten done. I also could have just nursed him and had a blanket over him...but im way to conscious of myself to do that with strange men walking in and out of my house.
But now im back on track..and have to remember that i HAVE to wake up at least once in the middle of the night to pump and then to pump ever 3 hours max. With a kindergarten and a  4yr old its hard doing that every 3 hours. I dont think my stress right now is helping any either. I drink close to a gallon of water a day some days more, and i will admit i have a addiction to caffeine. I have to have at least one diet pepsi in my day and a cup of coffee.  I just dont feel complete without those. Its hard but i have to do it to keep my lil guy strong.